running | super generic girl

February 14, 2013
by supergenericgirl 23 Comments

Three ways I’ve sabotaged marathon training lately

I’m hereby giving you permission to tell me stuff like “I told you so” and “we all saw that coming” when, in less than 3 weeks, I take so long to cross that marathon finish line that organisers will have packed up, gone home and started work on the 2014 edition. A few reasons why:

– Today, I went for a run. I didn’t even make it to 5km and that included walking breaks because I needed to double check that what I was feeling wasn’t actually both my lungs trying to escape out of my mouth. I’m not even joking. I’m telling myself that everyone has bad days and bad runs and one bad run doesn’t mean you’re out of shape but nothing really justifies what happened today, less than 3 weeks before having to run 42km.

– After that pathetic waste of clean running clothes, I ate curry (because when all else fails, you should just eat curry) and watched a repeat of The Big Bang Theory that contained the scene above. See Penny and Sheldon trying to touch their toes during their warm-up? When I warm up, I’m Sheldon. With the added disadvantage that I don’t even have a cool Flash t-shirt. Again, 42km in less than 3 weeks time. No toe touching. No Flash t-shirt.

– Last Friday, on a whim, I bought flights to Wellington and paid for the registration for the ISC Lenco Half Marathon which happens… this Sunday. A 24h trip to the capital to run 21k along its waterfront. It’s as good an excuse as any, right? Wrong. Less than stellar planning: three days after that, I’m supposed to be doing the final long (like actually really pretty freaking long) run before the marathon.

I laugh, you guys. I laugh so I don’t cry.

February 5, 2013
by supergenericgirl 12 Comments

What if you got hurt today?

Am I the only super pessimist runner who, on solo runs, always spends sometime wondering about all the bad stuff that could happen that very second and how would anyone she knows find out about it? Just me? Surely not.

I’ve had my share of near-misses with cars (but nothing that’ll make me give up my iPod while running) and I know there’s a reason even 5k events have ambulances stationed at certain points along the course. Bad stuff can happen any time, whether you’re out on a long run away from home or on a quick jog around your neighbourhood.

Oh dear. If you came here to be cheered up, it really wasn’t your best choice, was it? Here, have a look at this squirrel kissing a kitten. It’s okay. You’re not about to be hit by a car while you’re singing along to Will.I.Am and Britney during your run. Probably. Maybe. I mean, who knows, right?

The truth is… you might.

(I’m sorry. Here, look how this kitten hugs his teddy bear!)

But what if you do? Or what if you just get heat stroke and collapse? Or you trip and fall and hit your head? I mean, how many times has that almost happened to you while running?

(Cheer up. You almost fell but you didn’t and you made it home. Look at this panda cub trying to reach the window!)

Anyway, I usually take my phone out with me on my runs, mostly so I can take crappy photos to populate my Instagram and so I can check my email when I’m waiting for the green light. These days, my supposedly super rugged phone is a super rugged piece of crap, though. It takes me about 3 minutes to even load my contacts’ list so, if I’m in a life or death situation, I’m not going to sit there waiting for it to work. Especially because it’ll probably crash twice before actually loading any contacts and if there’s something I don’t need is an anxiety attack over the phone, on top of whatever else is already happening to me.

But even assuming that my phone worked properly (one of these days I’ll stop being such a cheapo and I’ll buy a new one), how many of you have a pin code on yours? So yeah, in a lot of cases, even assuming the stars align and you take your phone and it works properly, it’s still really not the best solution. I have an ICE number on my phone (I recorded it during a First Aid course I took last year), but I don’t want to rely on someone else being able to navigate to that, especially in a situation where timing might be everything.

So I went analog for safety while running and got myself a Road ID wrist band.

I thought I would only wear it out during long runs but the model I got is so discreet that I actually wore it for a couple of days before taking it off. I pretty much immediately forgot it was on my wrist (and I don’t normally wear bracelets anyway).

You can choose out of a few different models, with different colours and sizes (you can even get stuff like a tag for your shoe laces, if you prefer that to a bracelet) and the whole ordering process is very straightforward. You choose everything that gets engraved in the stainless-steel plate. The website has a bunch of suggestions of what to add, if you’re not sure, including tips on what medical information to give and even some inspirational quotes. It shows you what your bracelet will look like and gives you the option to make changes at any time during the process.

Living in New Zealand, I’m pretty used to getting ripped off on shipping costs from some US-based sites so paying around $2.50 for shipping was a really pleasant surprise (only about $1 more than to ship within the US). I got an email informing me that the bracelet had been shipped just two days after ordering and had the package in my mailbox in the time they said it would take for it to arrive.

The bracelet came in a neat metal tin and the Road ID website includes a section on how you can “think outside the tin” and re-use it, which I thought was a really nice touch (also, emergency wine glass!). It included a brochure letting me know that Becky had carefully packaged my bracelet (I’m a sucker for details like that) and some coupon codes to hand to my friends, along with the history of the company.

Road ID have a bunch of other items, all dedicated to safety outdoors (like high-visibility and reflective running and cycling gear) that I encourage you to check out. The bracelets are almost essential to any outdoors athlete, whether you’re a runner or a cyclist, but I think they’re a good idea for anyone who gets out and about (because, well, shit happens). I know a lot of keen hikers who should definitely invest in one of these.

If anyone looks at it and wonders if I’ll ever need it… I really hope I don’t. But I reckon 20 bucks is a pretty low price to pay for peace of mind (not just yours but of those around you too). And if you think it’s unnecessary, I hope I never have to prove you wrong.

My ability to conceal my emergency contacts’ information from the internet is only as good as MS Paint allows it to be. Don’t judge.

Road ID has emailed me a discount code following my purchase. The code is ThanksVera22242623 and can be used 20 times in the next 27 days (it was valid for 30 days but they sent it 3 days ago and I was too lazy to blog about it then). Go ahead and get $1 off now.

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This is not a paid/sponsored post. Road ID didn’t not contact me about writing this. I paid for my bracelet like everyone else and I’m writing about it because I truly believe it’s a great product that everyone should consider getting.

February 4, 2013
by supergenericgirl 26 Comments

Five themed runs we need in New Zealand

Some days, this is my definition of a fun run.

New Zealand running events organisers, let’s have a bit of a chat.

Having one of the most beautiful countries in the world as the scenery for all our running events means any run in New Zealand is guaranteed to be awesome. A lot of running events are referred to as “fun runs” (usually shorter events like 5 or 10k ones) and, although the fun is always there (if you’re into running, calling it a “fun run” is actually a little redundant), there are a lot more ways to add fun to the fun run.

I see a lot of international running events that not only add an extra element of fun to the run but, through that extra element, manage to attract new runners (people who aren’t too sure about running for the sake of running but who will take part in a running event if there’s something else in it for them). I follow the New Zealand running calendar pretty closely and haven’t seen any like the ones I will list below (do correct me if I’m mistaken and some of these actually exist in the country. Also, sign me up).

Here are five themed runs I would love to see in New Zealand:

1. The Color Run – I don’t think there’s anyone in the world who hasn’t heard of these. Even my tiny little country West of everything is getting one this year. Our neighbours have a Color Run tour. Are we going to let Australia have something cool and not get it ourselves too? I know I already run in pretty colourful gear but it’s time to get messy. Well, messier.

2. The Zombie Run – You know you love this idea. I don’t even have to say anything else about it.

3. The Beer Belly Run – I run and you hand me beers along the way. Make it New Zealand beer and we can even say we’re promoting kiwi companies. Deal?

4. The Donut Run – A run where aid stations hand out donuts is pretty much my definition of the perfect run. But I’m flexible. If donuts aren’t ideal, make it a biscuit run or a cake run. Or, since this is New Zealand, a pie run. Basically, feed me the good stuff.

5. A Wine Marathon – One day, a few months ago, I heard about the Marathon du Medoc and it immediately became a bucket list item. Not only do you run across gorgeous scenery but all the aid stations are stocked up with wine instead of water. New Zealand, why don’t we have this yet? With the amazing vineyards we have in places like Marlborough or even Waiheke Island, this really needs to happen.

January 22, 2013
by supergenericgirl 22 Comments

Some like it hot (the yoga, that is)

The 26 poses of Bikram yoga

(image source: a bunch of different people on pinterest)

I signed up for a 24/7 gym two years ago so I could go to the gym at really late hours when there’s almost no one there. I loathe group gym classes. Actually, loathe is not a strong enough word. Group gym classes bring out my murderous side. I’m one uncoordinated monkey crashing an otherwise perfectly synchronized choreography. It’s not pretty. So my return to Bikram Yoga today, after over a year of absence, was as inexplicable as it was sweaty.

I went through a period of regularly going to Bikram sessions a couple of years ago (go figure) but then the whole exercising in a pool of my own sweat while inhaling other people’s BO thing kind of got a bit old and so I swapped it for the gym instead (where I exercise in a smaller pool of my own sweat but still smell other people’s BO. But no, really, working out is great. Really really).

My yoga routine in the last year or so

My last Bikram session was back in November 2011, according to the nice lady behind the studio counter today (was that a judgmental look on her face when she said the date? I think it was). That last time was after my second half marathon. It felt good at the time but summer was just starting and the whole hot room thing wasn’t so attractive anymore. I thought I’d return to Bikram in winter, as a complement to my running, but then winter came around and I chose running as a complement to running. It’s really not hard to talk oneself out of spending 90 minutes working out inside a 40 degree room.

However, my muscles have been kind of stiff lately and I’ve noticed I’m not as flexible anymore so I thought this was a good excuse to go back and see if it really is true that yoga fixes the bad things running does to you. Regular yoga bores me senseless, unfortunately, so it was back to the Bikram studio for me today.

Most of the poses did feel a bit like the description in the top image but I’m convinced that’s because of the amount of time that’s gone by since my last session and also because my muscles are still recovering from last weekend’s long run.

Most of all, it felt like one massive stretching session. And it hurt really damn good, the way stretching after a long run does. Some of those who preach the benefits of bikram for runners also mention that it helps increase stamina and lung capacity. If that’s true, see you at the next available slot for another bikram session. Controlling my breathing is still one of my main problems when running so if there’s a fairly easy way to fix that then Namaste.

I’m by no means a yogi. There’s nothing zen about it for me and I’ve never been able to get “in the zone” during yoga (that’s something I can only do while running). I was mentally making my shopping list at one point during class. But it’s hard work. Really freaking hard work, for a considerable amount of time. You can’t convince me that’s not a good thing.

January 21, 2013
by supergenericgirl 3 Comments

One down, twelve to go

I crossed a goal off the list and got a t-shirt to prove it. I also got a hat and wore it but hats don’t suit me so I went with the headless look for this photo instead, for your benefit. You’re welcome.

When the alarm started going off at 5:30AM and I moved in bed to reach for it and shut it up, the pain on my legs reminded me I had just run 32km the day before. Naturally, I questioned what the flying heck was I doing getting up at stupid o’clock again but then I remembered that, later in the day, I’d have an item ticked out of my list of goals for this year so that helped. This is why I disagree with people saying new year’s resolutions are useless. Call them resolutions, call them goals, call them Harry, call them whatever you want. If they motivate you to get out of bed (even though it’s early and you’re in pain), they’re a good thing.

I had the chance to volunteer as a marshall on the run course of the Ironman 70.3 in Auckland and, with that, I knocked down one of my goals for this year.

Standing around for that many hours wasn’t the ideal recovery strategy post-long run but seeing all those amazing people getting off the water and onto their bikes, cycling 90km and then running a half marathon like it was no big deal really did help put my pain into perspective. I recognised a few of the faces along the course and collected a bunch of cool little memories, like 76-year old Garth Barfoot looking strong and thanking me for telling him he did or the couple of guys that raised their hands for high fives and they went past me towards the finish line. And I’m not even ashamed to admit that the little kid shouting “daddy! Daddy! You’re an ironman!” as his dad ran past him brought tears to my eyes. It was amazing, those people are amazing. My lack of better adjectives is less than amazing.

You mean machines. You make me want to go out for a run right now but my legs are all “uh, nope”.

So I’ll stop here. The point is that I’m pretty stoked to cross this one off the list. Running about a dozen of events a year, it’s about time I start giving back to all those people that come along to help out with those. I’m looking for other events to volunteer for but it’s hard because, whenever I find one, I want to run it rather than help out (that didn’t make me sound very nice but there you have it). In any case, I’ve submitted my interest in volunteering for the Auckland marathon this year so I’m not putting this goal behind me completely. Either way, CHECK!

January 20, 2013
by supergenericgirl 5 Comments

Pro Compression giveaway winner

My 10 days of reading about the awesome stuff that happened in your days are over (unless you want to keep telling me what is brightening your day, which I’m totally ok with).

I combined the comments with the Facebook likes (in the order they happened) and then used a random number generator to pick a winner because, if I had to choose, I’d probably guilt-trip myself into going bankrupt by buying compression socks for everyone who commented and, also, I don’t really have the energy to go through all comments and pick a winner.

Congratulations Leon Klijmeij, one of your comments made you the winner of this giveaway. Please head over to the Pro Compression website and choose the pair of marathon socks you would like to have, then email supergenericgirl at gmail dot com with the socks you want, your size and your postal address so I can give the good guys at Pro Compression all the details.

Thank you so much to everyone who entered. In an ideal world, you’d all get socks (and not just the ones distant relatives give you for Christmas) but I’m not Oprah so there’s nothing under your chairs. I know, it disappoints me too.

January 19, 2013
by supergenericgirl 18 Comments

10 things about my 20 miles

I took about ten photos along the run but they were all as grainy as useless as this one. I need a better phone for photos along my runs. And a hundred photography courses. Also, it was a road run, don’t let the photo fool you. There were only a few hundred meters like this.

Six hours of sleep, two pieces of toast and a chocolate croissant (don’t take nutrition advice from me) and we were on the road, bright and early this morning. We had water in our hydration bladders, some trail mix in our packs and a vague idea of the route we were going to take.

Thirty-two entire kilometers later (20 miles for you non-metric system adopters), we were at the dairy back near the start, getting a cold coke and celebrating our longest road run to date. Neither of us had run more than 21km since that epic day last May and neither of us had ever done more than 21km on the road.

It wasn’t the easiest of starts. I didn’t feel like getting out of bed when the phone started going off at 6AM. I wanted to close my eyes and ignore all sounds (actually, I wanted to throw the phone against the wall but I showed enormous self-control and just got up instead). I didn’t want to do it. At all. I wanted to get up at 10AM and slowly make breakfast and watch the Come Dine with Me omnibus. Instead, I have no idea who won Come Dine with Me this week (!!!) but I ran 32km before lunch instead. As hard as it is to get out of bed, I don’t think that was a bad trade off. Also, I learned a few things this morning and I bet you’re dying to know what they were (just nod in agreement, it’s fine).

1. I can (prolly maybe) run a marathon. If it goes anything like today, it’ll be really enjoyable for about 20km, fairly enjoyable for another 5km. Then my feet are going to start burning and it’s going to suck really bad, getting progressively worse as my legs decide to join the feet’s pity party. I don’t know how the remaining 10km will go, since we stopped at 32, but I’m fairly sure it’ll be shit. But hey, it’ll be done! (BRB, going to look for some wood to knock on!)

2. The trails are a lot nicer on the soles of our feet (and I suspect the body in general) than the road. I know we’re supposed to do road work for a road marathon but I really started missing the trails towards the end, with every painful step on the solid road.

3. Baz Luhmann says everybody’s free to wear sunscreen. I wish I remembered this more often. Sunscreen and vaseline are a runner’s best friends in summer. It doesn’t matter how well adjusted the backpack straps are, those little bitches always ends up rubbing on my neck and making it hurt on a long run.

4. Breaking the distance down in my head remains the best strategy for any long run. I may have run 32km but, in my head, I actually ran a half marathon and then, after that, a 10km run. It might all add up to the same but, in terms of my attitude, it makes all the difference.

5. 1L of water is most definitely not enough water for a run this long.

6. Maybe my legs wouldn’t have felt so heavy if I had remembered that I had a Gu in my backpack. I didn’t. The final couple of kilometers were a bit of a metaphor of Dante’s Inferno.

7. I’m perfectly happy not having any music out on the trails but I definitely can’t run very far without music on road. I’m not even sure this is weird. I guess the sound of traffic doesn’t have the same soothing zen-like effect that the sound of nature does.

8. Just because you can run for 25km without pain, don’t make the mistake of assuming that maybe, just maybe, that’s how the entire run will go. Pretty soon after that smug thought, everything will start hurting. Everything.

9. Despite being our longest road run to date, there wasn’t much fuss about it beforehand. We decided to do it just earlier in the week and there was no massive preparation or stress around it. We just went and did it. It’s not the first time I am led to believe that the whole “just do it” stuff from Nike is more than just marketing. Those smart cookies might have a point.

10. Sweat between your toes making them rub against each other and burn. This happened. It wasn’t pleasant. I just wanted to leave you with that mental image.

Despite the pain, it was an awesome run. I got home feeling all badass and stuff but was called back to reality when I couldn’t open the bottle of olive oil on my own. Apparently, I’m still a little bit of a loser. But this loser ran a really long way today. So there’s that.

January 17, 2013
by supergenericgirl 30 Comments

“I don’t have time” and other bullshit we tell ourselves

(know that meme)

A couple of years ago, when I was all “yay, I have a Kindle! I want to download all the eBooks on the internet!”, a friend recommended a book called How to Live on 24 hours a Day. The title sounded a little silly but I downloaded it anyway for three main reasons: 1) it was free (and I’m a sucker for a bargain), 2) it was short, 3) it got me one book closer to that “all the eBooks on the internet” goal mentioned above. I started reading it with the often misguided low expectations I have of some free stuff but it turned out to be one of the most enlightening books I’ve read in a while.

How to Live on 24 hours a Day sounds a little like “How to Inhale and Exhale Repeatedly to Avoid Death”. I thought to myself “I’m living. My days have 24 hours. So yeah, I think I’ve got it covered”. Some people (me) need the really obvious stuff spelled out to them. Some people (me) need a book from the early 1900s to tell them to get off Facebook and start making better use of their free time. To live rather than exist, as I think the author puts it at some point.

So, basically, I had a dude from last century schooling me on how to deal with my busy working life as a young adult in the 21st century.

Awesome.

Turns out this book, which is now 113 years old (!) is one of the earliest self-help books ever written. I read a self-help book. But it’s ok. I actually learned stuff. Plus, it’s philosophical in a way that I’m not sure other self-help books are. I haven’t read any others. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

But anyway, where was I? 24 hour days. Right. We’ve got lots of those. They come around every day. For the longest time, I got used to dismissing the entire five days of the work week as time when I couldn’t fit anything else in because I was working all day long.

The word you’re looking for is “bullshit”.

Let’s do some math (there’s something you won’t catch me saying very often): I work 8 hours a day. Add an hour for the commute. That’s nine hours. The day has 24. Nine and 24 aren’t even close together, there’s a whole bunch of other numbers in between. Sure, I sleep about 6 or 7 hours every night (on a good night), but that’s only a total of 15 or 16 hours dedicated to working and sleeping (I’m really kicking ass at these calculations, I wish my 7th grade Math teacher was reading this). Anyway, 15 or 16 hours a day for work + sleep. This leaves a whole other third of the day for other stuff. Stuff I didn’t feel like I had time to do. I know it sounds incredibly obvious now but I wanted to smack myself in the face when I read that book. What a load of bullshit I had been telling myself with that “I work all day” crap. I work a third of the day. It might be the best third – when the sun is out – but, mathematically speaking, it’s still only a third. The rest of the time is mine. And I had been wasting it on nothing.

What I’m trying to say is that, more than Runner’s World, online training plans or books by famous marathoners and ultrarunners, it was a time management book over 100 years old that helped me with all the running I’ve been doing.

So, just in case you suffer from the same problem as me, I thought I’d tell you that, like me, you’re just full of crap. You’ve got plenty of time. Safely remove that USB, it’s ok. You’re not in that big a rush. And the stuff you wish you could do during the week when you’re not working? Look at all that time you’ve got to actually do it! If the time you spent at work today felt like it was very long, it’s because it was. The good news is that you have another good few hours ahead of you to get stuff done. So wait for that You Tube video to fully load. Watch Jodie Foster’s Golden Globe speech in its entirety. Go nuts and read those terms and conditions (just kidding, ain’t nobody got time for that).

Every time I hear someone tell me they would love to get into running too but they just don’t have the time, I have to wait a few seconds to let my brain go from the instinctive “are you trying to say you’re busier than me? Because I’ll have you know I’m pretty god damn busy!” to something a little more grownup (but also patronising as hell) like “as a matter of fact, you do have time for that, if you really want to do it. You might just not be managing your time right.”

I still have a massive time management problem but I’m much more aware of it now. There are a bunch of things I wish I “had time” to do. I wish I was a morning person (or, alternatively, I wish I could show up for work at 11ish) so I could sit down for breakfast or properly dry my hair instead of the 30 second blow dry that leaves it just slightly-less-wet-but-definitely-nowhere-near-dry. I wish I had time every evening to prepare my lunch for the next day instead of resorting to the atrocious service and stupidly high prices of the cafe at work. But I guess what it boils down to is that I don’t really care enough about these things. Otherwise I’d find the time. If I don’t really want to do something, I’ll find an excuse not to do it. If I really want to do something, I’ll find the time.

Whoa. Enlightenment.

So, the bottom line is, I don’t have time for running because I’m any less busy than anyone else. I’ve got time for running because I really freaking love doing it and, so, I make time for it.

Bennett wrote in this book (that, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m highly recommending here): “We never shall have any more time. We have, and we have always had, all the time there is.”

So, if you want to run, get off your ass and run.

January 16, 2013
by supergenericgirl 1 Comment

Amazing people doing amazing things – the Mike Allsop edition

I just wanted to give you a heads up that when it gets to Monday, February 18, and you tell everyone at work you’ve got Mondayitis and Monday sucks and the day is dragging on, your day won’t be more exhausting than Mike Allsop’s day.

And when it gets to Wednesday, February 20, and you’re all like “hump day, yay!” and “roll on Friday!” and stuff like that, your week still won’t have been as exhausting as Mike Allsop’s.

And when you get to Friday, February 22, and you’re all “I’ve earned this beer!” at Friday drinks with your workmates, you will not have earned that beer more than Mike Allsop’s.

So, 32 days from now, when you wake up and your eyes feel heavy and your bed feels too comfortable to leave, think about Mike Allsop and life won’t feel so exhausting anymore. He’ll be out of bed, running a marathon on the Falkland Islands. One of the seven marathons he will complete in seven different continents in just seven days.

Seven marathons. Seven continents. Seven days.

It’s as insane as it is inspiring (and if you’re a runner, a marathon in each continent is pretty much the ultimate item on your bucket list). On top of that, he’s doing it for a good cause, to raise money for KidsCan. Mike is aiming to raise $10,000 for the charity so, if you have a dollar or ten weighing in your pocket, drop it here.

He is no stranger to big adventures but the 777project will be his biggest challenge to date (and I’m not entirely sure how he’s going to top this one). In an estimated 7 days and 20 hours, he will fly all over the world and run marathons in: Antarctica (Falkland Islands), Chile (South America), Los Angeles (North America), London (Europe), Casablanca (Africa), Hong Kong (Asia), and finally Auckland (Australasia). I got tired just from typing this paragraph.

Mike has his itinerary online with the start times of each marathon so, if you are in any of these areas, maybe go hand him a drink and tell him he’s awesome.

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Photo shamelessly stolen from the 777project Facebook page.

Previous instances of amazing people doing amazing things included Kim Allan’s 500k run/walk without sleep attempt and Michael Stewart’s 500th marathon.

January 15, 2013
by supergenericgirl 21 Comments

Marathon training like the underpants gnomes

The February issue of Runner’s World arrived in my letterbox last week with a painful reminder that the marathon is really close. Wonder if it’s too late to change my entry to that 2.2k option.

I know this is probably the weirdest blog post title I’ve ever posted on here but, as usual, I ask you to bear with me.

I’ve got a marathon to run in about a month and a half. Just under 7 weeks to be sort of precise. I can’t be any more precise because that involves counting the days until March 3 and I am really scared of doing that. If you know how many to go, don’t tell me.

I’ve been doing my little runs and every time S. and I run together we tell each other we “really need to get onto that Google Docs spreadsheet and come up with a plan”. Then a few days go by, we meet up for another run and we remind ourselves that, gee, “we really have to get onto that Google Docs spreadsheet and come up with a plan”. I mean, considering we’ve never run 42.2k in our entire lives and we’ve just come out of an indulgent holiday season, we should probably have a plan. Yeah, we really need to get onto that Google Docs spreadsheet and come up with a plan.

Tomorrow, maybe.

An article on Nerd Fitness* today talks about “crucial mistakes newbies make trying to get healthy”. After gasping at the realisation that I’ve been doing this shit for quite some time now but still make most of those mistakes, I realised that one of them, in particular, is the perfect description of my current situation.

The article mentions a classic South Park episode with underpants gnomes who collect people’s underpants as phase 1 of a 3 phase plan. Phase 3 is profit but they have no idea what phase 2 is.

You’re smart people, otherwise you wouldn’t be here, so you get where I’m going with this. When it comes to marathon training, I’m a freaking underpants gnome.

Now that I think about it, I have a phase 3 (cross the finish line in New Plymouth on March 3), but I barely have a phase 1 and I definitely don’t have a phase 2. I’ve been running as much as ~~possible~~ I feel like but I haven’t exactly been training.

Some might say “well, all those runs count as training”. You’re not wrong, whoever you are. But those are only a very small part of the training. And that’s pretty much the only part I’ve been doing.

I effectively have 7 weeks to quit aimlessly bagging small runs like the gnomes bagged underpants and actually come up with a proper plan that will lead to ~~profit~~ finishing that marathon (preferably without collapsing, but I realise I may be asking too much at this stage).

I need to outline mileage and make changes to my routine (more sleep, less coffee, better food), just like I did the last time I trained for something properly. Most of all, I have 7 weeks to change my attitude and get back into the “I can totally do this” mindset that I got into before that 35k trail run last year. To this day, I’m pretty sure that it was my mental preparation that got me through that race, more than any physical training.

So, yeah. We really need to get onto that Google Docs spreadsheet and come up with a plan. A scarily short plan.

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* Bookmark this site for the awesome star wars + lego images, visit regularly for the kickass content.