A list of stuff I’ve done recently that doesn’t matter because it wasn’t running

March 11, 2013 by supergenericgirl 22 Comments

Day 8 of not running. But who’s counting, eh?

Me! That’s who.

If I wasn’t so lazy and numbers didn’t bore me so much, I’d tell you how many hours it’s been since I last ran. It’s a pretty big number, I know that much.

The good news is that I haven’t killed anybody. The bad news is that I apparently woke up screaming in pain in the middle of last night thanks to my knee. It seems that, when I’m asleep, I have a tendency for drama. Luckily I don’t remember any of this in the morning.

It’s been a pretty uneventful week, to say the least. I’ve been limping my way to and from work and didn’t stray very far from the bed on the weekend either. But the fact that nothing is going on doesn’t stop me from giving you a really long and detailed update on all the nothing that’s been happening. All the hours that I would normally have spent running on a regular week have now been filled with other activities. So let’s recap. Over the last week, instead of running, I:

– Complained about how much my knee hurts.

– Got a full-body massage and fixed the back and neck pains that the marathon had caused.

– Went to a rock concert hours later and got some of those problems back, as well as adding “ears” to the list of sore body parts.

– Told everyone about the marathon (I swear I’ll shut up, people. One day. But really, a marathon!)

– Complained about how much my knee hurts.

– Iced my knee

I bothered with the towel in the beginning but now I just put the peas right onto my knee. I switch between different frozen vegetables to shake things up a little, since I’m basically ALWAYS icing my knee these days. I’m doing it right now, in fact. And you can’t even tell from there! Such an exciting life.

– Kept whichever pharmaceutical company manufactures Voltaren in business.

– Kept track of how many days I’ve gone without running

– Expected everyone to compliment me on the fact that I haven’t punched any of them even though I’m clearly two steps away from complete madness due to not being able to run.

– Talked some more about the marathon. Did I mention I ran a marathon?

– Iced my knee

– Read about running

Reading this book hasn’t been helping much in the way of containing my rage. I WANT TO RUN! But I can’t even go one step beyond where I am right now without limping.

– Made sure everyone in a 10km radius knew I’d run a marathon. Like, really, it was an entire freaking marathon!

– Slept in until 10:20 on a Saturday and 10 on a Sunday instead of getting up before the cat in order to run. So much free time, what do you guys do with it?

– Avoided the foam roller even though everyone tells me it’s the best thing since sliced bread (but they also add it hurts like hell and sliced bread doesn’t so that’s -10 points for the foam roller, +10 points for bread I don’t need to slice myself).

– Iced my knee

– Kept track of how many days it’s been since I last ran. Eight entire freaking days, and counting, in case you’d forgotten.

– Hung out with the cat more than the cat wishes I would

That’s her “this is the longest this idiot has spent trying to play with me” face. I’m afraid there’s plenty more to come, Zara! I haven’t even told you all about my marathon yet!

– Signed up for half marathons (one of them less than a week from today) because making running plans is the only thing keeping me from absolute madness.

– Avoided the foam roller some more

– Drank beer

– Limped

– Faced the foam roller. Didn’t die. Not sure it helped either. Kinda meh. Stay tuned for more exciting updates, as soon as I can be bothered driving to the gym to use that thing again.

– Ate everything in sight. Fact: marathons will make you hungry.

You know how some people save special wines for special occasions? I do that with breakfast cereal. This box of cinnamon-flavoured cereal travelled from Portugal to New Zealand with me last October. I saved it for a celebration. Running a marathon qualified as special enough.

– Realised that signing up for a half marathon in less than a week’s time was probably what some might call a “mistake”. By some, I mean every sane person on Earth.

– Iced my knee

– Got the Ice Ice Baby song stuck in my head

– Got excited about being able to take 10 steps without pain, only to realise the pain is back and the next 10 steps are going to be agony

– Researched post marathon blues on the internet and found out that they’re a thing. But, fear not, there are cures.

– Drank wine

Two different types of wine. There have been more. I don’t complain so much about this part. Post-marathon hydration is important.

– Dropped the marathon into every possible conversation. You have an iPhone? That’s cool. That’s the one with the Apple-shaped logo, isn’t it? Fruit is awesome. I had a banana before I ran a marathon last week.

– Complained about how much my knee hurts.

– Bragged about the marathon.

You guys. My knee hurts. Like, really, it’s time it stops hurting now. I’ve narrowed it down to 3 things: runner’s knee, ITB syndrome or gangrene. Just kidding. Don’t look it up on Google Images. Oh, you just had to, didn’t you? That’s gross.

Anyway, it’s probably one of the first two. Before you tell me that I should go see my doctor, I know. I know. I’ll get onto it soon. Give it another day or two. Don’t make me admit that I’m really terrified the doctor is going to tell me I can’t run for a month or two. Heads will roll and probably not just in a metaphorical overly dramatic way.

Because have I mentioned it’s been 8 days since I last ran?

But also, I ran a marathon eight days ago. So there’s that.